Sunday, February 25, 2007
Gore Comedy Wins
Al "the ever expanding blimp" Gore brought the audience at the Oscars and the other billion people watching, to their collective knees in hysterical laughter Sunday night. In his acceptance speech for his Oscar for best comedy, Al "the blimp" Gore giggled with glee as he recalled the many late nights spent making up crap for his movie. The crowd roared with laughter as he explained how in reality, CO2 and most of the other supposed "greenhouse gasses" that are going to destroy the earth any minute, occur naturally and that he had no clue what he was talking about. Between his own bursts of laughter, he managed to state that there was no positive correlation between the increase in CO2 and the slight warming trend over the past 100 years and that most of the statistical rise in average temperature during the last century was due to the warm period in the 30's - long before major industrial development. Melissa Etheridge, singer and boot-wearing bulldyke, practically fell off her chair laughing as Gore revealed that the science is inconclusive and that solar activity is the probable cause of climate change over the past 20,000 years. As the music played, signaling that Gore's fleeting minutes of fame were up, Gore skipped off the stage to raucous laughter and applause. In his brilliant comedic mind, Gore was already planning a sequel to his first comedy. Maybe he'd tell his life story and call it, "Gore, an inconvenient piece of crap". "Yeah", he thought, "just like the dog excrement that inconveniently ends up on the bottom of your shoe; that's just like me!"