Terrorist's War on Cars Continues

In another surprise attack, Islamic terrorists attacked and destroyed another perfectly good car. Their relentless mission to destroy the automobile seems to be driving force that fuels the continued carnage all over the world. Their broader vision apparently is a war on transportation - airplanes in the US, trains in Spain, subways and busses in London - but their favorite target is of course, the automobile. It is surprising how intelligence agencies, governments and military strategists have misdiagnosed the true aim of global terror. They keep thinking only in terms of the human impact these acts have when in fact, harm to innocent people is no more than unintended collateral damage to those who just happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. The true target of their hate is the car.

To discover this little known secret of the Islamic terrorist network I took an Evelyn Woods speed reading Arabic course and set out to do some research. It took some deep digging but finally I found the clues I needed and was able to connect the hidden dots. It seems that at the core of Islam is a profound love and respect for animals, the camel in particular. They actually have very close ties with P.E.T.A. and a little known Islamic organization, L.Y.C.T. (Love Your Camel Tonight). In a recent article in Al Jezeera, Osama Binladen writes of his love for his latest wife, and of the beauty of their courtship. It is quite moving. It is because of this devotion and love for the camel that they have such a deep hatred for more modern forms of transportation. They are deeply saddened and angered that over the past 10 years, camel sales have dropped off by nearly 40 percent. In an interview with a anonymous source in a terrorist network in Afghanistan, he shared that he suffers from chronic depression caused by the realization that his sons may not know the joy of emerging from their cave every morning to the warm wet kiss of the family camel. Instead, it will be the cold impersonal sheen of sheet metal on the Mercedes. It's no wonder they want to destroy all the cars.

Now that we know and understand the true goals of radical Islamic terror, the solution to ending the violence seems simple. We must remove all motorized transportation from these simple loving cultures and send representatives from P.E.T.A., the Sierra club and Green Peace to hand out flyers and share their mutual love of animals so that the terrorists will feel a kinship with us. Only then will the world have a meaningful and lasting peace and camels and will once again be at the center of the Islamic world.